


Mistletoe

by quackers



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment RPF
Genre: Cats as a plot device, Christmas Fluff, First Kiss, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:42:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28361868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quackers/pseuds/quackers
Summary: There's only room for one very specific cat in Ryan's life.
Relationships: Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej
Comments: 21
Kudos: 161
Collections: Skeptic Believer Book Club Secret Santa





	Mistletoe

**Author's Note:**

  * For [iBubbles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/iBubbles/gifts).



> For Mouza. I hope you enjoy pure fluff : P

It had been an impulse purchase.

A cat toy that consisted of a plastic stick, a long string, and fake mistletoe dangling from the end. The exact kind of cheap, tacky thing that he loved seeing around the holidays. And it had been right there next to the register at the grocery store. It wasn’t hard to throw it in with the protein powder and toothpaste.

Ryan tried not to think about the possible implications of buying a toy for a cat that wasn’t his as he knocked on Shane’s door, tightening his hold on all the various shit balanced in his arms.

He shoved a handful of letters into Shane’s chest when the guy finally opened the door, pushing his way past without a hello. “You forgot your mail again.”

“It’s all junk mail,” Shane replied with the impatient humor of someone who has said it many times before. “Besides, you always grab it when you come over, why should I do it?”

Oh. Right. Because Ryan had a routine now when he went over to Shane’s.

Because he went over often enough to _have_ a routine.

Not that that _meant_ anything-

"You're going to miss something important," Ryan said loudly over his own thoughts.

Shane scoffed, "Sure, I wouldn't want to miss-" he paused to peer at the top letter. "- a Christmas card from my insurance agent. Real important."

"Sounds like a good neighbor."

Laughing and humming a snatch of a commercial theme under his breath, Shane threw the mail haphazardly onto a counter. Then he stretched one long arm out to poke the gifts Ryan still held. “Presents early, Ry-man? You’ve still got a week before Christmas.”

“Only one of those is for you.” Ryan shouldered Shane aside, carefully turning his attention away from how easily the guy got into his personal bubble.

They were friends- _best friends_! Of course Shane was okay with getting into his space. Standing so close that he would have been a little threatening if he wasn’t so easy-going.

“Ryan, if you’re giving gifts to the resident spirit-”

“ _This_ ,” Ryan interrupted even as he laughed at the way Shane stressed 'spirit'. He dumped everything onto the counter next to the mail and grabbed the bottle of rum and hefted it like a prize. “This is for me. My gift to myself.”

"Oh, this is for getting into the _holiday_ spirit."

"I don't plan on getting into any other kind-"

"No ghost sex?" Shane finished the joke for him, grinning as he stepped closer to look at the bottle's label.

Ryan grinned back, something decidedly warm in his chest that didn't have anything to do with impending alcohol or the joy of Christmas and he hoped to God it was just heartburn. And not how happy he was that they were able to joke so easily together.

"If you're good, maybe I'll let you have some," Ryan said through his smile.

Too late, he realized how flirtatious that had sounded.

Like the worst kind of emotional trainwreck, Ryan could feel himself start to wink in addition to that horrendous line, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Luckily, Shane was too busy reading the label and rolling his eyes to notice either the wink or the spasm Ryan’s face went through immediately afterward as he tried to settle on an expression that wouldn’t be suspicious.

Or maybe it wasn't lucky, because Shane was once again stepping into Ryan’s space like it didn’t matter, like he wasn’t so close that Ryan could feel the warmth of his arm against his own. “Tempting,” Shane said easily, his own wink effortless and infuriatingly charming. It was clear that he didn’t care about standing so close or the tone of their conversation. “I see you’re splurging for that top shelf stuff,” Shane added with cheerful sarcasm. “Didn’t exactly break the piggy bank for this, did you?”

Ryan fought the urge to clear his throat. The holiday season always made his emotions that much more potent, that was the only reason he was noticing anything like their arms touching or the fact that Shane must have recently put chapstick on to make his lips slightly shiny. It had to be.

In the pause, Shane had already moved onto something more interesting than cheap liquor. “So what is all of this?”

“They’re-”

Looking so much like a curious, excited kid that Ryan had a brief flash of what Shane must have been like growing up, Shane brought a couple of the wrapped gifts to himself to look at them from all sides. “Which one is mine? Who are the other two for?”

Without thinking about his reaction, Ryan pushed Shane back once again, fondly annoyed. Shane’s shirt was warm under his hand. He couldn’t hide his smile that tinged towards embarrassment as he ignored the lingering sensation. “Two of them are for Obi, it’s nothing big.”

Shane blinked at him slowly. “Obi? My cat?”

“The only Obi I know that isn’t a Jedi.”

“Hey, my son could be a Jedi if he wanted to be,” Shane instantly defended.

Ryan snorted at the mental image, a laugh surprised out of him. “The little lightsaber would be so adorable-”

“The robes!”

There was a tap on the front of Ryan’s shoe and he abruptly noticed that they were so close that Shane’s foot was touching him. For once, the man wasn’t looming like a bad movie villain because of the way he was leaning on the counter, but it wouldn’t have taken much more than a shift in his stance to bring them _distressingly_ close.

“Ryan?”

Ryan glanced up to see that Shane was giving him an unreadable, nearly searching look. Realizing that he had been spaced out, staring blankly in the general direction of Shane’s face, Ryan scrambled for something to say. “So, uh-

Shane slid his foot in between Ryan’s shoes, straightening up from his slouch. They were suddenly so close that it was more awkward for them to not touch. Ryan started to lean away and then stopped himself, stubbornly refusing to back down, even if he had no idea what he was backing down from. “What do you think?” Shane asked casually. “Time for a liquid dinner?”

Other than the ridiculous lack of personal space, there was _nothing_ that Shane was doing that was odd, or- or _flirtatious_ or whatever Ryan might have wildly thought and hoped for. He was just staring at Ryan with his usual, small, slightly goofy smile and one eyebrow raised.

“Probably need to eat something, we’re not young anymore,” Ryan managed to say. And why the fuck was his voice so deep?

“Hmm.” And then Shane reached past him, his arm brushing Ryan’s shoulder as he once again picked up the damn bottle.

There was a hesitant pause, a moment of Shane looking down at him, eyes dark and mysterious and where the fuck had that romantic shit come from and why did Shane smell so good-

It was so silent that the quiet buzz of Ryan’s watch vibrating against the edge of the hard countertop made both of them look down.

The words on the screen of ‘High Heart Rate’ registered in Ryan’s brain and he jerked his hand behind him, nearly clipping the bottle with his hand in the process. Somehow they both ended up several feet away, neither of them looking anywhere near the other.

The situation was saved from being awkward when Obi walked into the kitchen and meowed imperiously, rubbing against Ryan’s shins.

Ryan had never been so happy to see a walking allergen.

“He isn’t the one who feeds you,” Shane muttered in their direction without actually lifting his eyes, busying himself with getting Obi’s food.

Letting out a long, silent breath in relief, Ryan relaxed and dismissed both the notification off his watch and the weird moment of tension from his mind. “Your cat has good taste.”

“He eats flies, Ryan.”

And just like that, everything was normal.

Hours passed without anything of note and Ryan managed to convince himself that nothing had happened. The evening ended with Ryan sprawled across the weirdly comfortable armchair he had claimed as his own when visiting, Obi cautiously sniffing at his fingers. Ryan was a dog guy through and through, but him and Shane’s spoiled orange boy had come to a sort of truce. Obi didn’t run away from him anymore and Ryan had started swallowing an allergy pill every day on the off chance he would end up at Shane’s.

Obi bumped his head into Ryan’s hand, then leaped onto his lap. Knowing exactly what was required of him, Ryan only grumbled a little as he pet the cat. Shane was doing something on his phone, and Ryan’s thoughts drifted in the comfortable silence.

It wasn’t like him to be so affected by Shane. This interest that he refused to call a crush- because he wasn’t fifteen and also mostly straight- had existed for years now. There was no real reason for acting like he was obsessed.

Well, it was the first time in their acquaintance that both of them were single at the same time. And they had been spending even more time than usual together. _And_ Shane had been physically closer lately in a way he never used to do.

And-

There were too many ‘and’s. He was going to drive himself crazy analyzing every single moment when Shane obviously only thought of him as a friend.

It really was just the holidays making him feel lonely. Had to be.

Obi started to purr under his careful petting, curled up in a furry lump, and the sight was so adorable that Ryan had to take a picture.

“People will talk if you post an insta of my cat on your lap.”

Ryan laughed quietly, though it was interrupted by a yawn. He glanced up at Shane, then quickly away. It was too late at night to decipher Shane’s faint, fond smile. He gently picked Obi up and deposited the now grumpy cat onto the floor, standing and stretching as he looked around for his shoes. “Think that’ll go to my personal stash.”

“Personal pussy stash?”

This laugh was much louder. “Right next to the personal cock stash.”

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Ryan’s entire body cringed so hard he thought he pulled something.

There was absolutely no way he was going to manage to make that any better, so he fervently hoped that Shane only thought of it as an obvious joke and tried to act like he wasn’t horrified by his own mouth.

He would blame how warm his face was on being bent over to tie his shoes.

Before Shane could say anything, because there was literally nothing he could say in response to _that_ that would make Ryan feel better, Ryan strode towards the door. Only to be stopped by Obi running after him and meowing loudly.

Ryan’s heart melted a little. “Hey, little guy,” he said softly, crouching down to scritch Obi’s head. “Trying to come with me?”

“I’m starting to think my cat likes you better than he likes me.”

“I told you, your cat has good taste.” Ryan looked up and his grin faltered.

Shane was watching them with the softest expression Ryan had ever seen on the man.

“I gotta- I should-” Ryan stood and gestured over his shoulder. “Home.”

“Yeah,” Shane agreed, the gentle curve of the corner of his mouth devastatingly tempting to touch. “We all know what happens when you’re fed after midnight.”

Ryan swallowed and said the first inane thing to pop into his head. “You going to feed me, big guy?”

That corner deepened into a lopsided smile. “Cute. Me and my son have matching nicknames. Go sleep.”

Ryan left, relief making his limbs loose and disappointment curdling in his gut.

\-----------------

“So are you bringing anyone with you for Christmas?”

Ryan thumped his head back against the carseat. “Mom…”

“I’m just asking,” his mother said calmly, most of her attention on parking the car. “I need to know if I need to make extra food.”

“You always make too much-”

“Like you aren’t planning on taking as much of the leftovers as you physically can.”

“Obviously, but that doesn’t mean you have to make extra.”

They got out of the car and grabbed the gifts and food, though Ryan’s peek into the bags earlier had revealed more wine than actual food. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know what his mom and her friends got up to during their get-togethers.

“So you’re not going to invite Shane?”

The only reason Ryan didn’t trip was because they had already rung the doorbell and stopped. “What? No! Shane isn’t- Why would I invite- No.”

His mother raised an eyebrow at him, her amused smile more embarrassing than it had any right to be. “So I guess you didn’t invite Steven, either?”

Ryan stared, his mind screeching to a halt. “What?”

“You said neither of them went home for Christmas, I thought maybe you would invite the people you started a business with to dinner. Since you’re single.”

The door opened before Ryan could answer, but he knew he had soundly lost that little battle. As usually happened with his mother.

There was the usual exchange of hugs and greetings as his mother greeted their family friend. Susan felt more like an honorary aunt than some of Ryan’s actual aunts and he had known her for years. His mother had roped him into coming with her to this small Christmas Eve brunch and he hadn’t tried very hard to fight it.

He needed a distraction from … Well, from Shane. And that whole situation.

“Ryan, you remember my daughter, Jayla? She’s home this year after that nasty divorce-”

“Mom, please.”

Thinking of memories from years ago, Ryan was half prepared to see a teenage girl with skinned knees and a skateboard under one arm, but the woman who walked towards them was nothing like he remembered. For one thing, she had grown into an utterly beautiful woman and he had to stop himself from doing a double take. She also had a long-haired cat under her arm instead of a skateboard.

“Jayla,” he said, waving awkwardly. “Haven’t seen you in awhile.”

Her smile was gorgeous when she laughed. “Yeah, I know, I got taller since then.”

She was petite and barely came up to his chin, so he couldn’t stop the obvious once over and the, “Barely.”

He noticed the smug look Susan sent towards his mother when Jayla laughed, but for the sake of politeness, he tried to ignore how obvious she was being about trying to set them up.

And the horrible thing was that it should have worked. At least well enough for a single date. The meal was fun and light hearted and Ryan should have quickly grown addicted to Jayla’s carefree and caring nature. He could easily see themselves becoming friends.

It was an enjoyable time. Better than he had expected a holiday brunch with his mom and family friend to be. But his heart wasn’t in it.

He just couldn’t bring himself to flirt or show off or make any serious indication that he was interested.

In the end, he spent the last half of the visit paying more attention to Jayla’s cat, who had hopped into his lap with the exact same sense of ownership that Obi showed.

Ryan kept his head down, his mind wandering as he absently petted the _wrong_ cat. Jayla was beautiful, funny, and from what he had seen, kind but with a firm sense of spirit. Everything he looked for in a woman.

A… partner?

So why was he giving up this chance when he was pretty goddamn certain that Shane only saw him as a friend?

When they finally left, Ryan had nothing more than some cat hairs stuck to his clothes to show for it. No number, no email, no promise to make contact later.

And he felt _nothing_ at the lost opportunity.

He needed to see Shane.

\-----------------

Maybe he should have done more than send a single text message, but the image of Shane opening the door with his hair sticking straight up on one side and his sweatpants barely hanging on was both hilarious and weirdly adorable.

And hot, but he was ignoring that part.

Shane pushed up his glasses, squinting like he had just woken up. “Ryan? Why’re you here so early?”

“Sorry, I just…”

Ryan nodded towards the inside of the apartment and Shane didn’t hesitate to step back and let him in.

“Did something happen? Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Ryan waved his hand to forestall the growing worry in Shane’s voice. Then he grimaced and waved both hands in a meaningless gesture. “Or, no. I’m not, like, dying or anything. But I- Fuck,” he groaned. “I should have just gone home.”

God, what was he doing? The shaky adrenaline rush of having come to some sort of decision was quickly draining away and now he just felt sick.

“Well you’re here now, sit down,” Shane said around a yawn, stumbling towards the kitchen. “Want anything to drink?”

Ryan shook his head. He knew for the sake of their friendship that he should have left, but he sank into ‘his’ armchair, oddly exhausted. Shane probably wouldn’t mind if he fell asleep there. They had already planned on his coming over later that night, so it wouldn’t be too much of an imposition, right?

Obi trotted into the room and meowed at him, proceeding to sniff at his pant legs and shoes with great interest. His tail started to swish back and forth and then he was twining himself around Ryan’s legs, barely able to fit in the space available.

“You step in dog shit or something?” Shane asked from right next the chair, startling Ryan. The man was holding a cup of freshly-made coffee and how had he managed to zone out like that?

“No,” Ryan said, still thrown by Shane’s sudden appearance. “He probably smells Jayla’s cat.”

The pause before Shane took a sip was barely noticeable. “Jayla?” he asked in a perfectly neutral tone.

“Woman I kinda knew as a kid. Our moms are friends. Think they tried to set us up.”

Shane opened his mouth, then made a face. “I was going to make a joke about getting some, uh, _cat_ action, but that seems wrong if it was your mom setting you up.”

Ryan laughed, a giggle that would have been more real if he hadn’t heard the faint strain in Shane’s voice.

“This, uh… Jayla? You going to be seeing her again?”

Shane was rarely subtle, but that time he hadn’t even tried. Ryan felt a little drumbeat of hope in his heart.

“She _was_ smokin’. Complete ten.”

Shane’s smile was so fake that it could have been made of plastic. “Cool, man. You properly trick her with that Bergara charm?”

“I can’t tell if that was a compliment or insult.”

Shane gave him a look that clearly said ‘insult’ before clearing his throat. He rocked on his feet and stared at the kitchen like he wanted to walk away but couldn’t quite bring himself to do it.

And maybe Ryan was reading everything all wrong. Maybe he was about to make a complete fool out of himself.

That had never stopped him from doing stupid things before.

“It was a beautiful cat,” Ryan said, abrupt and unable to hide his nerves. “Long hair, friendly. Great personality.”

Shane narrowed his eyes at Ryan, tilting his head in plain confusion, but didn’t say anything.

“It was, uh… the wrong cat, though. Didn’t feel right to pet it.”

Shane’s blink was slow before both eyebrows went up. “Ryan…”

Ryan looked away. God, that had been a terrible metaphor.

“You staying?”

“Yeah?” Ryan answered the sudden question cautiously, gaze on Obi. At least he could be pretty certain the _cat_ liked him. “That was the plan?”

“Cool.” Shane hooked a thumb over his shoulder. “I’m going to take a shower, since I guess I’m up now. You know where everything is.”

Huh. He did, didn’t he?

Ryan existed in a state between tense worry and thankful relaxation for the next few hours. Sometimes Shane would give him a _look_ , like Ryan was expected to know what he was thinking. Every single time, he began to quietly panic that his little metaphor hadn’t been that much of a mystery and now Shane _knew_ and was judging him for it. Both for the lame attempt at wordplay and the inappropriate feelings. The rest of the time, Shane acted like everything was completely normal and it was the same easy back and forth between them that it usually was.

They opened the gifts they had gotten for each other and Ryan was relieved that they had both gone the gag gift route. Though he had been genuinely amused and maybe a little touched by the set of ceramic red Solo cups. And Shane had announced he was going to use the No Shit, Sherlock bathroom spray as soon as possible, with the little gleam in his eye that meant he was going out of his way to make Ryan laugh.

Ryan was glad he had decided against buying the original movie poster from the first Mission Impossible. That level of thoughtfulness would have been far too damning.

Shane had unwrapped both the catnip- “Are you trying to get my cat _high_ , Bergara?!”- and the mistletoe toy with far more solemnity than he had for his own cheap gift. They had passed both the catnip and toy back and forth until Obi had simply stopped moving and lay down in the middle of the floor in protest.

Other than the crawling sense of worry that it was all going to come crashing down because he had dared to catch _feelings_ , it was one of the best Christmas Eves that Ryan could remember.

“I need water if I’m going to function tomorrow,” Shane announced, making his way toward the kitchen. Ryan grunted in vague agreement, lazily waving the stick with its fluttering fake mistletoe above his head. Shane hesitated next to Ryan’s chair as if he wanted to say something, but chose not to.

Too full and tipsy and tired, Ryan didn’t notice the pause. He couldn’t blame Obi for doing nothing more than following the path of the toy with his eyes. He was exhausted, too.

He was thinking about asking if he could crash on the couch when Shane said from above him, tone both shy and confusingly daring. “You trying to tell me something?”

Ryan tilted his head back. “Huh?”

“Did you know that mistletoe is actually a parasite?”

“... What?”

Shane was hovering over him, eyeing the mistletoe that was currently at chest height on him like it was going to bite. Ryan didn’t think there was anything that dangerous about a piece of plastic and cloth shaped like mistle-

“I don’t think you're tall enough for this when you’re sitting.”

 _Oh_.

 _Now_ Ryan was awake.

The flush that swamped Ryan’s body was hot and dizzying. Hope and disbelief made it impossible to answer right away. “So you mean mistletoe has never worked on you because it’s never above your head?” Ryan tried hard to rally, to force the words through lips that had gone numb, but the shake in his voice wasn’t doing him any favors.

“I’m not taller than _doorways_ ,” Shane said with an eyeroll.

“I’ve seen you have to bend to get through-”

And just like that, Shane was bending over Ryan, his face suddenly inches away from Ryan’s. His eyes were crinkled in a smile that was distinctly nervous and there was a splotch of red growing across his face that Ryan couldn’t decide if it was funny or cute. “I’m always willing to sink to your height, Bergara.”

“That,” Ryan said after a long pause and swallowing his heart back down his throat. “was honestly one of the most romantic things anyone has ever said to me.”

The blush bloomed across Shane’s entire face. Even his ears were red.

Cute, Ryan decided. Really fucking cute.

Shane licked his lips, a quick flash of wet pink that Ryan didn’t bother to ignore. “Sounds like you need a… Higher caliber of romantic lines said to you.”

“Why? You volunteering?”

Shane leaned closer, his body blocking out most of the light. Ryan’s heart was going a mile a minute and-

His watch buzzed cheerfully on his wrist and Shane glanced down at the quiet noise and laughed. It was a deep, pleased laugh that Ryan didn’t think he had ever heard before. “Your little watch thinks you’re having a heart attack.”

Ryan narrowed his eyes and made one of the easiest decisions of his life. He deliberately moved the mistletoe until it was directly above them. “Your move, tall boy.”

Huffing out a quiet laugh, Shane finally leaned down and kissed him.

It was normal.

It was awkward.

It was perfect.

A little wet, a bad angle for both of them, and Ryan really wasn’t used to kissing someone whose nose was quite so big. And he loved every single fucking moment of it. The soft laughs against each other’s lips, the faint flavor of beer, the scratch of stubble, and the inhaled catch of Shane’s breath when Ryan slid his tongue between teeth.

Ryan dropped the cat toy at some point and he couldn’t have given less of a fuck. He curled his hand into the front of Shane’s shirt and pulled the man down, the two of them breaking into laughter when they realized that Shane couldn’t really fit on the chair with him, but they did the best they could, anyways.

“I was jealous of a dang _cat_ ,” Shane muttered against Ryan’s jaw, husky and strained.

Too preoccupied with the feeling of Shane’s weight partially balanced across his lap, it took Ryan a moment to understand the words. “You… What?”

“You cheated on Obi with another cat,” Shane said, laughing and achingly sincere at the same time.

“Oh baby,” Ryan whispered, the word slipping out. He paused, but Shane only pressed harder into him at every possible point, his breath shuddering out in a long sigh.

“Obi is the only cat for me.”

**Author's Note:**

> I was given plenty of options for prompts, but I decided to smush a lot of them together. Is it at all coherent? Barely. But I had fun and hope y'all did, too!
> 
> Thanks to Jess and Emilia for your support on this little bit of fluff, and thanks to the Club of Books for putting this exchange together!
> 
> Come yell at me at mephsation on Tumblr. I'm slow at responding, but I try!


End file.
